Looking at Your Pain & Past with Peace

March 27, 2025

We have all heard the phrase, “forgive and forget.” There’s only one problem with it: You can’t do it. It’s impossible!

God does want you to forgive. And, with God’s help, you can choose to forgive. But, our memories don’t just get wiped when we choose forgiveness. But, guess what? God doesn’t necessarily want you to “forget.”

He actually wants you to be able to remember… not focusing on the pain, but he wants you to remember HIS healing and HIS faithfulness. He wants you to be able to look back at your past from a place of being healed. If you could never look back, that wouldn’t be real healing.

When you give God your hurts, you can get to a place of looking back, and instead of feeling the hurt, you can focus on how far he has brought you. You can remember how faithful HE was in your healing.

You don’t have to forget the wrong thing someone did to you. You couldn’t forget even if you tried! But God says there’s no need to forget it. You just have to forgive and then see how God will bring good out of the hurt.

So, instead of forgetting your past or running from your past or avoiding your past, you can look back on it from a place of victory. That is freedom.

When you choose forgiveness and allow God to heal those places of your heart, your past doesn’t haunt you. You’ll actually look back and have gratitude for how God drew close to you in your pain and used it for good. Yes, good.

Romans 8:28 says, “And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose” (NIV).

Notice the verse above doesn’t say that all things are good, by the way—because all things are not good. Disease is not good. A broken relationship is not good. War is not good. Abuse is not good. There are a lot of things in life that are evil. Not everything that happens in this world is God’s will.

God is the only one who can bring good out of bad like that in our life. But, to get there, you have to trust him with your hurt. And, you can trust him with your heart, especially when you are in pain.

“The LORD is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit.” Psalm 34:18

But God says he will work good out of the bad things in life if you will trust him. You can go to him and say, “God, I give you all the pieces of my life. Even my pain. Even my past.”

He will take all your pieces and, in return, he will give you peace in your heart.  

When you forgive and have the peace of God, you don’t have to forget. You can remember his goodness.